Appreciation

Amy Oledzki on March 3, 2025

I woke the other day to a beautiful heavy snow. It happened to be on a Saturday, so my morning was a bit more relaxed. The picture from the sunroom window, here at the Iris Respite House & Healing Gardens, was breathtaking. I stood there, looking out the window, mesmerized by the beauty. I felt gratitude and appreciation for what nature was providing. Quickly, the feeling left me as I moved my focus back to the long task list that I put together for the weekend of hopeful accomplishments. I expressed (out loud, I might add), “Why does my day have to be so full of ‘to-dos’?” The tasks on my list were important and needed to be done, but how can I slow down this weekend and appreciate something as soothing as this snowy morning? I wanted to just continue to stare, but thought, how unproductive.

Appreciation is the focus for the month of March. When stress and to-dos happen, self-sabotaging tendencies appear. While nature is one constant in our lives, it can help with appreciation and all the little things in life, but the busy-ness of the day seems to always get in the way. How can we appreciate the surprise of what is below an overturned rock, the transformation of a deciduous tree in the autumn season, the continuous flow of water from a rain storm, or the plant showing its beauty after a long cold winter season?

In this scenario, the moment of surprise was the snow. I know that nature’s rhythm is a reminder of resilience and renewal. We share and shout this message from Hope Grows quite often…blah, blah, blah! But how, even in the midst of stress and many to-do’s can these small moments of wonder anchor you in appreciation?

While the morning went on and I kept busy with the to-do’s, I noticed the snow turned to rain. I found myself drawn to the process of this particular element of nature, in the moment, as it switched from snow to rain. Something happened that I haven’t felt in a while. I was inspired, almost awe-struck at the grounding this change in weather created. I took a moment and just watched, even opened the door to breathe in the scent it was bringing. I watched it move across the window. Even in those few seconds of noticing, I felt a small act of appreciation amidst the busyness of my morning.

As the day continued to unfold, the weather changed several times from rain to snow, back to rain, and then snow again. In fact, the entire weekend’s weather did this; it kept flip-flopping, as if it switched to the rhythm of my endless list. I found myself noticing small acts of appreciation throughout the weekend, gently shifting my awareness from the busy weekend to what was happening outside my window and then back again. I was super excited at the end of the weekend, as it had been one of the most productive weekends in task completion that I have had in a long time. Was it the small acts of appreciation of nature I kept engaging with or was it just pure coincidence? I don’t know, but what I do know is the way I chose to engage perhaps made the difference. Consider trying the following:

  • I Paused – for just a few seconds, I took a break from the rush of my to-do’s. It wasn’t a long break; it was just enough to acknowledge the moment.
  • I Observed – I tuned into my surroundings. I noticed what was happening in the here and now of nature, in my environment, and even within myself. I took mind of the way the snow looked, how the rain sounded, the scent from the door, and in the filling of my lungs with the air.
  • I Acknowledged – Internally, I took notice. I even made comments out loud. “Look how large those snowflakes are!” “Oh wow, it now turned to rain.” “The scent of the air outside is intriguing.” “It’s snowing again, this is beautiful.” I expressed gratitude for the beauty before returning to my tasks.
  • I Felt – I allowed myself to experience a sense of gratitude, wonder, and connection, even if it was for a brief moment. It seemed to reinforce the habit of appreciation as I kept looking out the window between tasks.
  • I Returned – I went back to my tasks, but continued to carry out the moment of noticing and appreciating. I kept setting an intention to notice one more “smaller” thing out the window as the day went on. I was excited to wake the next day of the weekend and continue with my tasks; I found I didn’t dread the remaining to-do’s and ended up feeling so accomplished.

As the weekend came to a close, I realized that appreciation doesn’t need to be grand. It can be woven into the smallest of moments. I think the process became more intuitive as I kept noticing what was happening to me and outside. Despite the many tasks on my list, I felt rested, relaxed and restored, and accomplished.

With a mission to inspire hope through nature while empowering family caregivers to seek wellness of mind, body, and spirit, we focus on resting, relaxing and restoring as a way to appreciate life. This acknowledges both the challenges caregivers face and the power of nature in fostering well-being. Rest, relaxation, and restoration are not just luxuries but essential parts of sustaining appreciation and resilience.

By taking mindful moments, such as the above, becomes a way to embrace and encourage one to “take a break.” This process instills appreciation. At Hope Grows, we incorporate and encourage others by gratitude practice, mindful techniques, use of healing gardens, the language of flowers, bird watching, connecting to nature, aromatherapy, and labyrinths…to name a few. This beautiful holistic approach weaves together mindfulness, nature, and sensory experiences. Each of these practices offers a unique way to slow down and connect—whether through the symbolism of a labyrinth, the stillness of bird watching, or the grounding presence of a healing garden.

The next time your list has many to-do’s on it, try to appreciate the beauty outside the window in small moments of time throughout your day. You just might feel rested, relaxed, and restored in your busy-ness and have a new found sense of appreciation.

In appreciation of all of you!

Lisa Story, MSCP, LPC, CT
Founder & Clinical Director

Tenacity

Amy Oledzki on January 8, 2025

January’s focus is about tenacity, with Clematis as our flower pick and Laurel Leaf as the essential oil. Tenacity, by definition, is persistence, with some synonyms including courage, mettle, resolution, and spirit. I believe that spirit and tenacity largely overlap, with spirit suggesting a quality of temperament enabling one to hold one’s own or keep up morale when opposition is threatened.

Wow, that is a mouthful! But it brings me to a time shortly after the death of my dad. I found myself in therapy for the heaviness of grief and, in sharing my narrative and struggles, the therapist asked if I had always been this tenacious. I had to laugh as I pondered the question. I never considered myself to be stubborn, as one of the synonyms suggests. I may be adamant at times, a true natural inheritance of DNA, and definitely strong willed, but never stubborn.

I’m comfortable sharing as I believe to fit the description of a determined spirit that does not give up easily. This has served me well in my life; even as a child, it brought me closely connected to nature and most comfortable in the forest. As John Muir put it best, “Into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul.” In the woods or forest, I am at peace, a soulful energy comes alive and, as some have described me, a force with which to be reckoned.

Enough about my connections to self and nature – let’s consider how YOU can connect to help with your tenacious spiritual side. One way would be to consider our essential oil pick for the month, Laurel Leaf. Its healing properties are antibacterial and antiviral, and its top uses are for viruses, cold and flu, congestion, cough, and pneumonia. If used for emotional balance, it can help one go from self-sabotage to a victorious feeling. A great spiritual energy as well, it connects us to our soul and has long been associated with purging and clearing. Is not winter a time for being inside? Not just inside our brick-and-mortar protection from the cold and wind, but to go inward to the depths of our soul and ponder over what to purge, clean out or clear, and make room?

Another way to bring more tenacity into your life is the Clematis plant. It symbolizes tenacity and adaptability, rooted in its growth patterns and characteristics. This vine-like plant is known for its ability to climb and thrive in diverse conditions, reaching for light and support with determination. Its delicate-looking flowers contradict the strength and persistence required to flourish in often challenging environments. By incorporating its imagery into your life, you might be inspired to persist through difficulties with elegance. Its essence is a reminder that tenacity often lies in the quiet, consistent pursuit of growth and light.

Regardless of how you decide to bring more tenacity into your month, consider the following.

  • Embrace the stillness that winter’s quiet offers and let it mirror the inner quiet needed for spiritual growth.
  • Learn from nature’s resilience and the lesson of endurance and renewal from the evergreens, snowdrops, and the cycle of dormancy.
  • Open to the stark beauty of winter. It creates a spiritual awareness of the sacredness of the frost patterns and the interplay of light and shadow.
  • Look inward and discover our own light during the long nights. We are called to reflect as it aligns us with self-awareness, inner strength and the divine spark within ourselves.

Spending time in winter landscapes brings us fully into the present moment. There is a mindful moment of breathing in the cold crisp air, walking in the snow, or even laying down and making a snow angel. No worries though, if you cannot go outside. Open your window and let some cold air come in, and then watch the birds, the flurry of the snow, or notice how the snow sits on the branch. The benefit is the same.

So, if you can, put on a coat/gloves/hat/boots and engage with nature! We not only will cultivate tenacity, but also nourish our souls. It is in this interplay between the external and the internal, the physical and the spiritual, that we discover the profound connections that ground us and uplift us through every season of life.

Lisa Story, MSCP, LPC, CT
Founder & Clinical Director

Flourish: Our Theme for 2025

Amy Oledzki on January 8, 2025

Happy New Year! Hope Grows spent some time over the holiday season recharging and enjoying time with family. “Taking a Break” has been something that Hope Grows has incorporated into their work model since the founding. Practicing what we teach not only has helped us to continue to deliver our Model of Care at the top of our game, it helps us help caregivers flourish.

During this break, not only was connecting with family important, but connecting with nature was, too. As this time of the year marks the beginning of the changing season, I prefer to embrace it with excitement, not dread. Yes, winter is, for some, a time of trepidation. The freezing temps, snow and ice, and the darkness lend itself for an emotional storm. However, if we think about the positive of what winter can bring, our souls can flourish. John Muir so brilliantly put it, “Climb the mountains and get their good tidings.” Well, I wasn’t expecting anyone to climb a mountain over the break (I sure didn’t), but his message continues to say that if you get good tidings from the mountains, “nature’s peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees.” Then, “The winds will blow their freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves.”

Perhaps if we look at winter as an increase in energy, we can begin to flourish. I believe that his message is about taking time, especially during the depths of winter, to allow the tenacity of nature and perhaps, winter, to help us flourish. To flourish is a beautiful and profoundly tenacious concept for reflection. To flourish in the darkness of winter, whether it’s the literal season or a symbolic period of challenge, requires resilience, adaptability, and inner strength. Embracing the cold, with a bit of steadfastness, can remind us that even in the most barren times, growth is possible, and life continues to find its way.

As the seasons of the year cycle through this year, consider the thought that flourishing can become a testament to our capacity for renewal and transformation. The goal is to not just find beauty and purpose in the coldest moments, but throughout the year as well.

To flourish spiritually means nurturing the seeds of hope, love, and faith within, even in times of stillness or challenge. It encourages us to trust the process, to be present with what is, and to cultivate gratitude for the subtle growth that often goes unseen. Reflect and consider how you would like to embody this flourishing spirit as you journey through winter and each new season in 2025.

Happiest in Nature!

Lisa Story, MSCP, LPC, CT
Founder & Clinical Director

Closing Current Doors to Open New Ones

Amy Oledzki on December 2, 2024

If you follow my blog posts and the story of Hope Grows, you may remember the spiritual and divine part of the beginning of the mission. I was always a person that when a door closed in front of me, (not literally, but figuratively), I would stand behind what occurred and wonder what I did wrong, what could I have done differently, or what do I need to improve in myself to have made the opportunity work. Basically, I was hard on myself.

As the story goes: after my dad’s death, he appeared in a dream to me, and upon wakening, the first thing I said was, “Hope Grows.” I then would talk to his spirit and ask for guidance in making sense of his visit. Soon after, the idea of supporting family caregivers and grief and loss was born, and I began building the mission/vision of Hope Grows. During that time, the one thing I changed about myself was not deliberating over a “door being closed.” When an opportunity became unsuccessful, I asked, “Dad, show me the open window.” Sure enough, something would present itself without much effort behind it.

Closing current doors to open new doors (or, in my case, new windows), speaks to the often-challenging decisions we make when we choose to leave behind familiar situations, routines, or relationships to allow room for new possibilities. It’s a process that involves understanding what no longer serves you, or what may be holding you back, to make space for what could propel you forward.

As we wind down the year of 2024 and consider any New Year’s resolutions, lets talk a bit more about wrapping up the year with the message of letting go; it can be both daunting and deeply freeing. Charging forth into the new year with a fresh perspective requires a bit of intention.

An end-of-year reflection can help us release missed opportunities and unmet expectations. This is essential in freeing us from holding on to something that isn’t working. In looking back at my visitation (dream) from my dad, the spiritual awakening that had occurred brought courage to let go of what wasn’t working. In this case, the pain of losing him, the loss of identity I was feeling, and the need to create something bigger than myself; this had many highs and lows. No doubt, my experience was divine, as there is more to the story, but I found the strength to let go of my attachment to how things “should” have been and I reclaimed an energy and a focus, built from the love for my dad, his love for nature, and my mother’s love for plants and flowers.

I’m not sure that I was acknowledging any missed opportunities or unmet expectations in my life, other than a need to heal from my loss, to move away from how I was viewing me, and just begin to engage in life differently. Retreating to nature to find that peace was what I did and believe me when I say, I met a lot of resistance and faced a lonely path at first. For starters, my family and spouse were not on board at first and, in hindsight, I believe they were acting on their own emotions of fear of losing a mom and wife to something they didn’t understand. I was the matriarch, always making sure their needs were met, and I suppose there was a twinge of egocentricity from them from my new found directive in life.

The more “doors that seemed to be closing” on starting a nonprofit, and designing and implementing the existing healing gardens on the property, the more I felt power, determination, and a reclaiming of vigor and motivation. I trusted in myself more than I ever had in my life, which bolstered my ambition. The motivation was stemmed from envisioning the new path and what I had hope to achieve. To this day, I am still hoping the big vision of this unfolds, with many more Iris Respite Houses & Healing Gardens throughout the country, and achieve the nation-wide support this mission deserves.

As the new year carries a sense of promise for a new door opening, remember that we are all continually evolving. I continue to embrace the concept of when the “door” closes, I ask Dad for the “open window.” So, I invite you to let go of what isn’t serving you and look for the possibilities of who you can become in this life of yours. Embrace the renewal, or the opening of a new door as a gift.

One last thought with nature as a focus: if you need a bit of help, think about the Siberian Fir and the Blue Spruce. They carry wonderful symbolic messages of closing one chapter and opening another. These trees grow in rugged environments, enduring harsh conditions and changes, yet they remain resilient, tall, and majestic. Here are a few ways these trees can inspire the journey of closing a current door and opening a new one:

  • Strength & Resilience – like the trees, you also have the strength to endure changes and face uncertainty.
  • Rootedness – these trees are deeply rooted and you, too, can be deeply rooted in a new possibility. Focusing on your values and skills that ground you, even as the winds shift when facing changes.
  • Evergreen Nature – the fir and spruce are evergreens, symbolizing renewal and the ability to stay vibrant through all seasons. Draw inspiration from this in knowing that letting go is not an end but an evolution of your journey.
  • Adaptability & Growth – as mentioned, both trees thrive in challenging climates, demonstrating the beauty of adapting. It is imperative to trust in your ability to adapt and find beauty in the growth.

Above all, don’t forget that using imagery in this way can help you find the potential possibilities in the transition of closing the door and opening a new one.

Letting go our attachment to how things “should” have been can feel a bit like defeat, but trust me when I say it is a powerful way to reclaim energy and focus.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! See you in 2025!

Lisa Story, MSCP, LPC, CT
Founder & Clinical Director

The Ability to Pivot

Amy Oledzki on April 3, 2024

The ability to pivot in tough situations is a hallmark of resilience and is worth focusing on this month as winter changes to spring. Blossoms are plenty this time of year as the trees, bushes, spring bulbs, and perennials begin to erupt with beauty. However, as the weather doesn’t know how to make up its mind from cold to warm, and then cold again, the ability to pivot becomes the nature of the game (no pun intended).

For me, pivoting from winter to spring is always difficult. While I love the new blossoms, I thrive in the winter with “internal regrouping,” as I call it. The snow and cold of winter contribute to my deep, inward thinking and reflection. However, with the past couple of winters not being very cold and snowy, I feel like I have not had the break my soul needs.

None the less, as I reflect about this topic of pivoting, my birth order comes to mind. Being the youngest of six children, I believe I had an inner strength that was different than those around me. Was it my place in birth order, being one of 46 first cousins or having nieces that were closer in age to me than their parents, who were my siblings? Or did it have something to do with the fact that I was being raised by the village, not just my parents? Not sure of the reason, but my ability to pivot I believe is deeply connected to my inner spirit. The ability to draw upon my inner strength creates a resiliency that helps to adjust my mindset to manage effectively and put in place coping skills. 

Throughout evolution, organisms have developed various adaptation mechanisms to survive in changing environments. These mechanisms include physiological, behavioral, and psychological traits that allow organisms to adjust to new conditions. Humans, as a part of these organisms, inherit this adaptability, which contributes to their ability to pivot in tough situations.

The ability to pivot refers to the capacity to bounce back from adversity, challenges, or difficult circumstances, and what a better essential oil choice this month than the arborvitae. The majestic and strengthening properties of this tree are not only grounding, the tree often lives for over 800 years – Arborvitae means “Tree of Life”. The emotional properties of this essential oil mean Divine Grace. Engaging with this oil can help with relaxation, breathing deeply and trusting in the flow of life. Perhaps I should use this oil as I transition during this time of year.  

All and all though, it takes resilience to be able to pivot. While the arborvitae is resilient, humans have to implement strategies. One strategy is to remember and recognize the times where you have successfully pivoted in tough situations. When we remember success, we can then continue to promote resilience as a valuable skill that can be cultivated and strengthened over time.

Staying strong, holistically, is important too. I will admit though, the older I get, the harder it is to stay strong. Some days it feels like it takes twice the effort to do certain things and my resilience and ability to pivot is affected. I reflect at what is going on in my life; an overloaded schedule, not cultivating the earth, and not taking enough time to “stop and smell the roses.”

Whatever the reason, cultivating resilience, adopting a positive mindset, embracing adaptability, nurturing emotional well-being, and finding meaning and purpose can all contribute positively. Out of all the suggestions, I believe that finding meaning and purpose is at the top of the list for being able to continue to pivot. A purpose has to be in place so that you want to get out of bed in the morning, and a strong spirit can help with that.

Apr Bleeding Heart

I would be careless if I didn’t comment on the plant choice for the month: the bleeding heart. This resilient early spring-rising plant is full of resilience and strength. Its symbolism can help when we are being too sensitive or we emotionally react to the world around us. Its unique beauty can help draw upon our values and beliefs to navigate the challenges one may be facing.

All and all, focus on what matters most and align your actions with your values. You can then pivot towards a more meaningful and fulfilling life, even in the presence of adversity. A good take away is that nature can serve as a source of inspiration, wisdom, and resilience. I have often said, “nature doesn’t ask of anything from me, it is one place that I am able to let go of control.” And when you let go of control, nature will guide you to observe and learn, and to develop the adaptive skills necessary to navigate challenges and thrive in an ever-changing environment.

Written by Lisa Story, MSCP, LPC, CT
Hope Grows Founder & Clinical Director

2024: Empowering Family Caregivers through All Seasons

Lisa Story on January 2, 2024

Happy New Year! Every new year brings remembrance, review, and resolutions; it also brings change. The change can be small, such as writing a different year on financial documents, to something bigger, like the planning and cleaning out of closets and drawers. It can also bring about internal changes of self.

Vern McLellan, a writer, speaker, musician, broadcaster, and associate pastor, once said, “What the new year brings to you will depend a great deal on what you bring to the new year.” I happen to agree and believe this to be the answer in bringing about positive change into the new year. Evaluate what isn’t working and make change, resolution, to move forward.

I know this may sound cliché, but I love planning for resolutions and this time of year. I thrive on change and the changing of seasons. The autumn season used to be my favorite, but the older I get, the more winter is becoming my season of choice. Perhaps it’s the stillness and the beauty that sparks from its dark and dreary place, or the inward rebuilding of what nature appears to do without effort. Whatever it is – the beauty in the gloom, the acceptance of changing moods, or cyclical phases – is, without a doubt, at the top. I happen to thrive for the newness that internal change brings; it sparks inspiration and empowerment.

The theme for 2024 is Empowering Family Caregivers through All Seasons. The changing of seasons can be, for some, overwhelming and bring on a sense of restlessness; perhaps a bit of what caregiving may look like. As the seasons change, empowerment can be a valuable antidote for the restlessness.

Empowering the soul in the midst of those dark and dreary days can be challenging. It can also be a transformative experience; as in nature, there are lessons and opportunities for resilience and growth. One of the lessons is the positive thoughts that can occur. While December 21st marked the change from Autumn to Winter, it also became the shortest day of the year. The positive antidote to the often-dreary feeling when this happens is that each day moving forward gets lighter and longer.

As I’ve mentioned in previous blogs and speeches, there is a reciprocal relationship that exists between self and nature. What the new year unfolds is what we choose for the new year, and can help us consider what we have and don’t have control over. So, try to bring with it the positive side of change. Empower the soul by embracing the complexities of life. Find strength in adversity and cultivate a mindset that allows for growth and transformation, even in challenging conditions.

Empowerment in the context of caregiving and loss involves taking intentional steps to regain a sense of control, confidence, and well-being. With caregiving, sometimes it is putting self first – putting the oxygen mask on and taking “Just 10-Minutes” for a short break.

The Hope Grows Think Caregiver program continues to remain a source of strength for caregivers. If you are new to the program, it consists of monthly check-in phone calls, bi-weekly emails that offer Simple “Self-Care” Suggestions, and moments of self-care and respite activities and support. Hope Grows has 11 years of working with and understanding the impact of providing care and the impact that loss has on the mind, body, and spirit. Our goals for those caregiving and grieving are about cultivating wellness; regaining balance and perspective, along with empowerment as some of the benefits. We value those we help with a supportive, understanding, and encouraging way to help navigate the challenging stages of both caregiving and grief.

Learn from the silence of what nature is bringing us right now. In the stillness of a dim and lifeless natural setting of winter, there can be a profound opportunity for introspection and self-discovery. The quietude of nature can be a powerful teacher and perhaps bring that thought into the new year.

Written by Lisa Story, MSCP, LPC, CT
Hope Grows Founder & Clinical Director